i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
