Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
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