can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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