Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize