Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
