I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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