Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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