I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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