its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
