Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
