idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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