He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
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