8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize