Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
