I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
so much tequila, so little girl.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
