I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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