i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Even my vagina gasped.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
