butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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