do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
