do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
