i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
You pole danced in your parka.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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