if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
