One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize