You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I believe in your delicious
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
