I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize