Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Where did you get a picture of my penis
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize
