Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
handjob tips. give me some.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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