Please, let me fuck your mom
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize