Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
