He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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