Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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