So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
