16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Randomize
