I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
