Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
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