Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Randomize
