It's Friday. Sex?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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