There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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