hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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