I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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