Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
