like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize