So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Dick very happy bro
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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