Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
