I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
ugly people sure do ruin things
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
try to milk me bitch
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
