he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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