I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
