She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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