From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
