Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
