I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize