You can't special order awesome
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
You were trust falling into bushes
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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