I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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